Learning to Love Yourself When Others Don’t

I lost a bunch of followers after posting an anniversary picture of my girlfriend. I didn’t care because I have learned how to love myself when others don’t. Self-love is a difficult thing to master. To this day, it is something that I still work on struggle with. My journey has been long and difficult and filled with growth along the way. Here are a few of the things I’ve learned.

You are not for everyone

You are not for everyone. It’s the hard truth. Making everyone happy is never possible. It doesn’t mean that you aren’t a good person, it just means that everyone is unique. There are plenty of human beings out there that I love and others that I just don’t resonate with. That’s okay! Just because we may not resonate with someone doesn’t mean they aren’t a great person. I’ve tried to get close to them, but we just don’t vibe together and that’s okay!

Get rid of negativity

This is IMPORTANT- pay attention to your surroundings! You attract what you are and you also become what you are surrounded by. Sooo, if you’re surrounded by negativity, you become more negative. How does this end up? You start attracting it too.

Take time to figure out who you are feeling. Why are you feeling this way? What prompted it? Is it due to what you are surrounded by, your own views, or both? Identifying negative surroundings can be difficult and letting go of those surroundings is even harder. Give yourself time!

You come first

Take care of yourself- you come first. The way to love yourself is to spend time with yourself. Think about a friend you are getting to know. How do you get to know them? How do you learn to love them? You spend quality time with them. This same idea goes for learning to love yourself when you feel that others don’t. How will you love yourself if you don’t dedicate time to yourself?

This all starts will self care. Some of my favorite ways to practice self care is to start my day without my phone (very bad at this one lol), create a night routine, and simple habits like washing my face before bed instead of ignoring it.

Inner work and healing

Along with self care, spending time doing inner work can bring you closer to yourself. Reconnecting with your inner child is like reconnecting with your youngest, most innconcent self. A huge reason for lack of self love is due to the fact that we are built updon subconsious beliefs and behaviors that we grew up learning. Take a moment to give your younger self, the self that was free from those subconscious beleifs, some love. Go do fun activities to honor your inner child, enjoy the little momentse, take time away from your phone and live!

No more comfort zone

Start stepping out of your comfort zone so that you can be yourself. This takes a lot of getting used to, but its a huge confidence booster.

When I was dealing with a major lack of self confidence, I gave myself a challenge. I wanted to do one thing outside of my comfort zone everyday. I started small and built it up. One day I complimented a stranger’s shirt. The other day I sang to a song I liked in public. I kept stepping out of my comfort zone over time. When I started, I was so uncomfortable but as time went on, I started to love it!

Trust yourself

Last but not least, trust yourself. You’re doing better than you think!

I have always said confidence is not about being perfect, it’s about loving and recognizing your flaws. No one is perfect, but everyone is special. Sending you all love!